the Unwilling Pearl

"She felt like a fool, let loose, however involuntarily, in a highly organized community which now wished to organize her too: like the grain of sand that gets into an oyster's shell. What if the grain doesn't want to become a pearl? Is it ever asked to climb out quietly and take up its old position as a bit of ocean floor?"

-- Harry Crewe

The Blue Sword by Robin McKinley, pg 83

Sometimes I don't think I want to be made into a pearl either. Sometimes I just want to be left alone to the quiet rambling thoughts in my head and I don't want to have to be responsible or participate with the world. But when you compare the grain of sand to the pearl, which one is more interesting? Sand may look interesting under a microscope, but a pearl has more of a story to tell. The beauty and rarity of the pearl compared to the grain of sand is incomparable. The sand may be contented to have been left alone, but the pearl's joy is fuller.

As I become a "grown up" I struggle with whatever it is that makes us into pearls. I want to be a lovely, white haired old lady with interesting stories and a sound understanding of humanity and life, but I don't like getting my little grain of sand rubbed so hard sometimes. I know if I get out of the oyster I'll never become who I want to be, so I make an effort to engage. After all, Harry Crewe became Harimad-Sol who was more than she ever thought she would be.

Do you sometimes feel like a grain of sand? Do you see the pearl you can become?